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Posts tagged NBA

This is a pretty awesome visualization of every NBA Championship Ring (organized by team) from the year 1947 onward.  One thing to note is that, try as you may, you will not find a ring of LeDouche’s in this picture, as he has yet to win an NBA title; last night’s beautiful loss to the Dallas Mavericks dropped him to 0-2 in the Finals during his “productive” 8-year career:

[via Hoopism]

This has to be one of the cooler things a sports franchise has ever done, despite the fact that the management are the people that put this together and, in reality, have nothing to do whatsoever with the outcome on the court on any given night and, thus, are in no position to be guaranteeing anything…but now I’m just getting critical.  Golden State’s fans have a reputation for being loud, loyal and coming out in droves wearing those dope Warriors’ colors and certainly deserve a competitive team…so props to the higher-powers drafting a contract guaranteeing the following things:

 

(click for a closer look or, alternatively, look at the cliff’s notes version I’ve outlined/stolen from another website below)

The contract stipulates that:

1. THE CLUB will reach the 2012 NBA Playoffs.
2. THE CLUB will have a player participate in the 2012 NBA All-Star Game in Orlando.
3. THE CLUB will win 25 or more home games at Oracle Arena.
4. THE CLUB will honor a Risk-Free Renewal, with a 5% Interest Guarantee Option for the 2011-12 NBA season.

Now if only the Warriors could draw up a contract guaranteeing that the Heat would never win another game…that would be impressive.

[via The Basketball Jones and Ball Don’t Lie]

Derrick Rose slammed home the MVP against the Knicks last night in spectacular fashion, highlighted by two dunks in particular that are simply unbelievable for a player listed at 6’3.” The guy is absolutely unreal, and it will be an outright travesty if he’s somehow robbed of the MVP, though I don’t think he’s left much room for debate with the way that he’s played over the last few weeks of the season.
The first dunk here is the alley-oop that he caught last night, a normal lob that he somehow manages to catch with two-hands, throw down with one-hand and do it all in traffic on top of everything:

And then here’s your run-of-the-mill, double-clutch reverse-dunk (that would have won the dunk contest in 1993 a la Harold Miner) but that D-Rose decided to do on a breakaway last night:

And, finally, because no Derrick Rose v. Knicks video-post is complete without what he did to them in November of this season, here is that dunk again, which, in my opinion, remains the dunk of the year…and that’s with all the Blake Griffin dunks included:

Kind of makes you feel bad for the Knicks though right? Nah, me neither. D-Rose: you’re my hero.*

[via Byron & SI & YouTube]

* “Hero” meaning “Hero who isn’t Michael Jordan…”

The argument has finally been decided conclusively in Rick Reilly’s article published the other day, in which he asks a bunch of former players, coaches and others associated with the NBA who would win in a one-on-one game between Kobe and LeDouchebag:

Trainer Tim Grover (Attack Athletics in Chicago), who has trained Bryant, James and Michael Jordan:

Hard to say. Kobe could back LeBron down, too. He’s that strong. Don’t put me in this spot. I’m not picking.

How about Jordan versus either man?

Grover: Oh, Michael. No question. From a physical and mental standpoint, he’s the best I’ve ever seen. If he were playing now, with the way the refs call everything, and with all the padding these guys wear, he’d average 40 or 50 a night if he wanted.

So it’s settled.  Oh yeah, by the way, MJ would have scored 100 points in today’s NBA…says MJ.  Greatest person ever.

[Thanks Odge]


To save the three of you that read this blog the pain of reading an eight-page rant about my hatred for LeBron and how his behavior/this fiasco has just solidified that fact with me forever, I’m just going to post links to two articles that really summarize my feelings a lot better than I can.  Also, this picture is great too.

LeDouche

Enjoy the reads:

1. LeBron James Is A Cocksucker: This article was written by Drew Magary, contributing editor to Deadspin, and it’s awesomely awesome:

Tomorrow is the day LeBron James becomes the most unlikable person in the NBA, and perhaps all of American sports. I used to think he was okay a year ago. No more. He’s the villain now.

It doesn’t matter where he opts to go. If he goes to Chicago, he’s a cocksucker. If he goes to Miami, he’s a cocksucker. Even if he goes back to Cleveland, he’s a goddamn cocksucker. He’s a self-aggrandizing sack of shit, and ESPN is a bunch of pussy-whipped enablers for giving him a free hour of airtime tomorrow night and inevitably using 55 minutes of it to let Stu Scott give him a rimjob.


LeBron is now the guy you openly root against. If he leaves Cleveland tomorrow night, he’ll have needlessly strung along an entire fanbase and given them the middle finger by making their breakup spectacularly public. If he stays, he’ll have spent two years cockteasing the rest of the world about going somewhere else when he probably never wanted to leave Ohio to begin with. There’s no end result tomorrow that makes LeBron a sympathetic figure. He’s already gone past the point of no return. He’s a cocksucker. Fitting that his most memorable career moment will come when he doesn’t even take a fucking shot. He’s a guy that cares more about the end result of playing basketball – massive, unending adulation – than he does actual basketball.

2. Countdown to the LeBronocalypse: And this one was written by the Sports Guy, Bill Simmons, who, as he sometimes does, puts it perfectly:

…If LeBron picks anyone other than the Cavaliers, it will be the cruelest television moment since David Chase ended “The Sopranos” by making everyone think they lost power. Cleveland fans will never forgive LeBron, nor should they. He knows better than anyone what kind of sports anguish they have suffered over the years. Losing LeBron on a contrived one-hour show would be worse than Byner’s fumble, Jose Mesa, the Game 5 meltdown against Boston, The Drive, The Shot and everything else. At least those stomach-punch moments weren’t preordained, unless you believe God hates Cleveland (entirely possible, by the way). This stomach-punch moment? Calculated. By a local kid they loved, defended and revered.

It would be unforgivable. Repeat: unforgivable. I don’t have a dog in this race — as a Celtics fan, I wanted to see him go anywhere but Chicago — but LeBron doing this show after what happened in the 2010 playoffs actually turned me against him. No small feat. I was one of his biggest defenders. Not anymore.


I think it’s a cop-out. Any super-competitive person would rather beat Dwyane Wade than play with him. Don’t you want to find the Ali to your Frazier and have that rival pull the greatness out of you? That’s why I’m holding out hope that LeBron signs with New York or Chicago (or stays in Cleveland), because he’d be saying, “Fine. Kobe, Dwight and Melo all have their teams. Wade and Bosh have their team. The Celtics are still there. Durant’s team is coming. I’m gonna go out and build MY team, and I’m kicking all their asses.” That’s what Jordan would have done. Hell, that’s what Kobe would have done.

In May, after the Cavs were ousted in the conference semifinals, I wrote that LeBron was facing one of the greatest sports decisions ever: “winning (Chicago), loyalty (Cleveland) or a chance at immortality (New York).”

I never thought he would pick “HELP!”


LeBron joining Wade after his 2010 playoffs flameout, in my opinion, is like Conan O’Brien getting kicked in the teeth by NBC, then overreacting and forming a late-night version of “The View” with Chris Rock, Adam Carolla and Jeffrey Ross over trying to create his own show somewhere else. (Note to Carolla and Ross: Don’t get excited, it’s only a hypothetical.) Total cop-out. The move of someone who, deep down, doesn’t totally trust his own talents any more. And maybe he doesn’t.

Such eloquent poetry…I could quote both these articles all day, particularly Simmons’ article because it’s longer, but take a look at them yourselves, take a look at that beautiful picture above and then think about it before tuning in to LeDoucheFest 2010 at 9PM tonight.  Regardless of what happens, after this week I won’t be disappointed.

[via Deadspin & ESPN]

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