Because my opinions are better than yours

Posts from the MJ Category

This is a pretty awesome visualization of every NBA Championship Ring (organized by team) from the year 1947 onward.  One thing to note is that, try as you may, you will not find a ring of LeDouche’s in this picture, as he has yet to win an NBA title; last night’s beautiful loss to the Dallas Mavericks dropped him to 0-2 in the Finals during his “productive” 8-year career:

[via Hoopism]

…Assuming you, too, think Michael Jordan is the second-coming of Moses, like most normal people…

Either way, this video is still absolutely awesome, and, somehow, I’d never seen it before until the other day:



A little background from Chitwood & Hobbs (an excellent blog, I might add):

Italy, 1985: Michael Jordan scores 30 points and shatters the backboard in a Nike exhibition game. I don’t know which is stranger — that I have never seen this video before or the uploader choosing the Crocodile Dundee theme music as soundtrack.

[Also] don’t miss one of my favorite YouTube comments ever:

Somewhere in the world today there is a 22 year old, half-Jordan half-Italian walking around, cause you know when you break a backboard, you get laid.

[via Chitwood & Hobbs]

The argument has finally been decided conclusively in Rick Reilly’s article published the other day, in which he asks a bunch of former players, coaches and others associated with the NBA who would win in a one-on-one game between Kobe and LeDouchebag:

Trainer Tim Grover (Attack Athletics in Chicago), who has trained Bryant, James and Michael Jordan:

Hard to say. Kobe could back LeBron down, too. He’s that strong. Don’t put me in this spot. I’m not picking.

How about Jordan versus either man?

Grover: Oh, Michael. No question. From a physical and mental standpoint, he’s the best I’ve ever seen. If he were playing now, with the way the refs call everything, and with all the padding these guys wear, he’d average 40 or 50 a night if he wanted.

So it’s settled.  Oh yeah, by the way, MJ would have scored 100 points in today’s NBA…says MJ.  Greatest person ever.

[Thanks Odge]

Forever (single cover)

The biggest hip-hop song of the year, “Forever,” by Drake, Kanye, Lil’ Wayne & Eminem, gets the biggest hip-hop video of the year (directed by Hype Williams, of course) on what, I think, is going to be the biggest surprise film of the year, “More Than a Game,” the documentary that chronicles LeBron Douche and his four douche friends from middle school to superstardom, assembled from the thousands of hours of home video that someone just happened to record over those years.

While the film’s success will remain uncertain until it is released on October 9th, even if it turns out to be a hit, it will battle for second place at best on the “basketball movie” genre list, as there is just no way it could ever possibly top a movie co-starring Bugs Bunny…and that’s a fact. So we’ll just leave that discussion at that.

Space Jam

Either way…peep the video; it’s hot. And as sick as this song is and as much as I love all the artists in it, it leaves me thinking one thing every single time the song ends: when Em is on his game, he really is on another level than everyone else. It’s good to see that he’s still got it and that he won’t be rhyming in that “For Me to Poop On” voice for the rest of his life.

And if you haven’t yet, do yourself a favor and download “Forever” right here

[via OnSmash]


There comes a time in every blog’s life where a post is so perfect that it truly transcends the existence of the blog. In fact, the post is so good, and its content so utterly spectacular, that it necessarily renders every subsequent blog post inferior for the rest of time. Well, my friends, the new Nike LeBron James – Kobe Bryant puppet commercial is out, and this post is officially that post.*

The below commercial, 33 second of pure, unadulterated bliss, is so good and shits on LeBron so hard that it took me a full three days (until I just saw it on TV about ten minutes ago) for me to even believe that it was a real Nike commercial and not just the product of some fellow computer-hacking-Lebron-hater/my hero out there in the blogosphere. The pacing, the cinematography and, more than anything, the outstanding puppeteering all come together in perfect harmony, brilliantly intertwining into what will almost certainly go down as the greatest (at least in my mind) commercial of all time the juxtaposition of the shit-eating grin on Kobe’s face against LeBron’s metaphorical “eating [of] shit” at the breakfast table. Although it seems as though not everybody agrees with me (e.g. Awful Announcing), this is my blog.
So, finally, and without further adieu, I present to you the latest, the greatest and, unfortunately (after Nike made the marketing move of the century by continuing the commercials despite LeBron sadly losing the Eastern Conference Finals single-handedly), the final LeBron James-Kobe Bryant Nike puppet commercial:

Although none of the other puppet commercials even hold a candle to the genius of this one, feel free to watch all of the MVPuppet commercials here on Nike’s website.

UPDATE (6/19): After perusing the Nike basketball site, it turns out that there is, indeed, another “MVPuppets” commercial, this one presumably being the final one for the season. It’s called “LeBron 2010″ and shows LeBitch “preparing” for the 2010 season. Since it still shines a losing light on LeBron, I’ll allow a link to it, albeit a small one, right….here.

*While this is, indeed, the truth, and I can almost guarantee that every subsequent post from this one on out will necessarily be inferior to this one, there is one significant fact that one must keep in mind: not enough people read this blog for it to really matter. So, from hereon forth, despite the magnitude of the above posting, nothing about Blogbdon will change whatsoever, as I promise to continue to provide you with the same marginally useful information and mediocre literary ability.


Michael Jordan was chosen to be inducted into the Basketball Hall of Fame on Monday.

Michael Jordan was elected to the class of 2009 on Monday, set for induction in Septemeber with his Dream Team teammates David Robinson and John Stockton.

I can’t go on without the video from his induction speech yesterday that they show on SportsCenter; it’s absolutely amazing.  Instead, here’s another obnoxiously large but awesome picture of MJ:

mj reverse.jpg

UPDATE: I still can’t find a video of the speech; the best I can find is some quotes from it from the Philadelphia Inquirer and a couple of other places.   I’m holding out hope that the video will surface at some point today, but in the meantime here is what believes are MJ’s Top 10 Dunks:

Also, please entertain yourself with:

- a quick f you to LeBron James;

- another obnoxiously yet awesomely large picture of Mike;


- and, finally, Scoop Jackson’s Top 10 MJ Moments:

10. April 17, 1986. Game 1 of the first round of the playoffs versus the Boston Celtics. The game before the famous 63-point game. Scored 49 points in one of the greatest displays of shot-making ever seen. Actually a better performance than the 63-point game.

9. Oct. 26, 1984. His first pro game, versus the Washington Bullets. Scored only 16 points, but tried to do a baseline dunk on Jeff Ruland and Rick Mahorn that let everyone know what the future was to be like.

8. March 28, 1990. The 69-point game versus Cleveland. Only two dunks. Prelude to Phase 2: his jump shot. Also had 18 rebounds and six assists.

7. March 18, 1995. First game at Madison Square Garden after returning from retirement. “The double-nickel game.” Two games later, on March 25, 1995, he hit the winner at the buzzer against Atlanta. Then slapped the floor at midcourt. He’s baaacccckkkk.

6. Feb. 7, 1988. NBA All-Star Game in Chicago. Forty points. MVP. Won the dunk contest over Dominique Wilkins the day before. The introduction of Jordan 3, his first true signature shoe. Greatest individual weekend for any athlete.

5. June 12, 1996. Game 4 of the NBA Finals versus Seattle Sonics. “The fear factor game.” Held to nine points in the second half. Scored only 23 points. One of his worst performances. And although the Sonics won the game, their players on the bench were pulling for Jordan to make shots because they were afraid he’d score 50 on them the next game.

4. (tie) Nov. 21, 1986, versus the New York Knicks. Scored the Bulls’ last 18 points, including a jumper at the buzzer to win the game.

May 26, 1997. Game 4 of Eastern Conference finals versus the Miami Heat. Went 1-for-22 with nine points going into the fourth quarter, having missed his first 15 shots. Scored 20 in fourth. Almost won the game.

3. Nov. 16, 1988, versus Charles Barkley and the Sixers. Scored 52 and missed only five shots, while Barkley had 42 points and 16 boards. One of the best one-on-one battles of Jordan’s career. This game cemented their friendship and respect for each other.

2. May 7, 1989. Game 5 of the first round of the playoffs versus Cleveland Cavaliers. “The shot.”

1. June 11, 1997. Game 5 of the NBA Finals versus the Utah Jazz. “The flu game.” A 103-degree fever. Vomiting. Couldn’t walk off the court without help. Scored 38 points. The most dramatic performance of our time.

More to come later…

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