Blogbdon

If you’ve never checked it out, The Onion Sports consistently has some great stuff on there (e.g. “Alfonso Soriano Regrets Joining 40-40 Club After Meeting Other Members,” “Favre: I’ve Always Had A Passion For Stopping Things, Then Starting To Do Things Again,” “Goalie Clearly Living in Net,” etc.), although you might be hard pressed to find an article as good as this one (at least in my opinion, which, as you may recall, is better than yours):

LOS ANGELES—Dodgers left-fielder Manny Ramirez, sent to Los Angeles in a three-team trade two weeks ago, said Monday that he “really likes” the Red Sox’s new blue-and-white uniforms. “I like it more than the red,” Ramirez told reporters following the Dodgers’ 8-6 win over the Phillies Monday. “I’m also happy that they shortened the Green Monster, and painted it blue, because that wall was too tall before. And I’m really enjoying the easy schedule we’ve been playing lately.” Although Ramirez admitted he didn’t appreciate having “that vampire from the Yankees” [Joe Torre] hanging out in the dugout all the time, he did say that he “completely approves of David Ortiz’s new mustache” while gesturing towards Dodgers second baseman Jeff Kent.

[Via the Onion].