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Because my opinions are better than yours

Summer\'s Eve Douche

I will admit that I, probably not unlike yourself right now, was a bit skeptical when I first encountered a blog claiming to have uncovered the douchiest phone message in history.  But now, having now listened to it myself, I can assure you that this is just that: the absolute douchiest message in the history of this here universe. It is also one of the most quotable, altogether funny things I have seen in a long time.
You can listen to the message below (ignore the lame slideshow that someone made to put it on youtube), immediately after a short synopsis from the site on which I found it:

In all my years of studying douchebaggery, never have i encountered anything like this. It’s such pure and unadulterated douche that I wish I could bottle it and use just a drop of it at a time.

The back story on this is that a girl named Olga was out with her friends in the Marina district of San Francisco (known for being a popular hang out for douches), and she talked to this guy named Dmitri for all of two minutes. Then she gave him her card and said “give me a call.” The above is the messages he left. Listen to the whole thing, it just keeps getting better and better. I won’t even tell you my favorite parts because i don’t want to ruin anything. Just listen.

UPDATE: Well, it didn’t take very long for Dimitri (his name….obviously) to become an internet sensation; he has already been named #1 on Gawker’s 5 Scariest Seducers list and, more importantly, has HIS OWN FREAKING WEBSITE called Dimitri the Lover!

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  1. Dimitri #
    July 5, 2008

    I don’t find the humor in your post. I’m serious. I won’t call back again. This is your last opportunity.

  2. Brandon #
    July 7, 2008

    @Dimitri: stop calling me weirdo!

  3. tboner #
    October 21, 2009

    Maybe the best thing I've ever heard…thanks Brandon

  4. tboner #
    October 21, 2009

    Maybe the best thing I've ever heard…thanks Brandon

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