This post was intended to celebrate this incredible country and the incredible holiday created on today’s date: Steak and BJ Day. But, in the process of celebrating writing about today’s joyous holiday (created as a response to the unfairly female-dominated Valentine’s Day and celebrated exactly one month later: on March 14th), I became aware of the unfortunate news that the Steak and BJ website is down, diminishing much, if not all, of the credibility of my piece. In fact, I can no longer confidently even say that it exists. So, today, rather than speaking of this new, grand American tradition and its parallel to our country’s indelible spirit of brotherhood, I decided to dedicate today to something else: excrement.
And if you’re still wondering about Steak and BJ day, google it.
“#1”
- Learn how to turn your pee blue
- Contribute to the environment and turn your pee into fertilizer
- Learn the answer to the age-old question: does eating asparagus really make your pee stink?
- Finally, take a look at the pee-powered batteries they are selling over in Japan. Really.
“#2”
- A good introductory guide to feces with an elegant focus on classification: the A-Z of shit
- Contribute to science and take a poop survey
- If you so desire, feel free to rate your (well, everyone else’s) poo
- Read about the bowel movement occurring in New York City
And now that you’re sufficiently nauseous, check out the new $5 bill
















